Watching The Defectives

Christopher Spivey


I see that the Essex Bacon Buggers are staying true to form what with yet another of their upstanding Cuntstables having been arrested for child porn.

Indeed it is no wonder that the “failing” Police Farce are being investigated over corruption claims and purposely bungled investigations into sex-crimes.

And they stand accused of failing to protect children (Source), which – given the fact that all of the top hogs are at best paedo protectors – is no surprise at all:

AN Essex Police officer is facing a jail term after admitting having 1,600 indecent images of children.

Clive Hansen, 53, pleaded guilty to three counts of making indecent photographs when he appeared at South East Suffolk Magistrates Court, in Ipswich.

A total of 17 images were Category A – the most serious grading. One of the counts refers to 26 Category B images, while the remaining 1,576 photographs were Category C – the least serious grading.

Hansen, of Borrowdale Close, Benfleet, also pleaded guilty to possession of a prohibited image of a child.

All of the offences took place on October 30 last year, the court heard.

Three days later the police online investigation team acted on information that Hansen, a serving police constable, was in possession of indecent images of children.

He was arrested the same night outside his home and taken into police custody.

Computer equipment was seized from his home, including a white Acer laptop on which images were found. The children in the photos ranged in age from eight to 14.

The court was told the aggravating features in the case involve Hansen being a police officer and the offence being a serious breach of trust.

Magistrates agreed that the offences and aggravating factors involved were beyond their sentencing powers and sent the case to crown court. Magistrates can hand out a maximum prison sentence of 12 months.

Hansen was given conditional bail. A date for his sentencing at Ipswich Crown Court has not yet been set.

A spokesman for Essex Police said: “PC Clive Hansen pleaded guilty to three counts of making indecent images of children and one count of possessing a prohibited image at Ipswich Magistrates court yesterday Monday, February 13.

He is currently suspended from his position as an officer and will remain so until the conclusion of the criminal case and any misconduct proceedings.”

Hansen was based at Rayleigh police station before his arrest last year.

During his career he led Horsewatch, a scheme set up to protect the animals and their owners from theft.

He has also been involved in promoting youth services to the public and stamping out antisocial behaviour. Source

PHOTO: Plod-Nonce Hansen

Why the fuck does Plod-Nonce Hansen remind me of Essex Chief Constable Stephen Kavanagh without his make-up on?

PHOTO: Stephen Kavanagh without his make-up on

Course you just know that Hansen’s perverted stash won’t have been made up of Nan Goldin photos, Graham Ovenden paintings and Led Zeppelin album covers.

And indeed, even the extremely tightly controlled media have been allowed to report (albeit not widely) on the fact that 51 Essex Police Orifficers & SS (support staff) have – in recent years – been investigated for the sexual exploitation of crime victims.

That alarming figure is based on a report compiled by Zoe Billingham on behalf of “Her Majesty’s Inspectorate of Constabulary”, who criticized Kavanagh’s Kinky Kunts (KKK) for sitting back and waiting for victims to complain rather than getting up off their fat jacksy’s and “proactively seek intelligence on potential corruption from a variety of external sources such as women’s refuges, sex worker support groups, websites, gyms and local partners”.

On the plus side, Billingham did praise the force for: “actively publicising the arrest, dismissal and conviction of former Chief Insp Ben Hodder, 34, from Thurrock, who admitted making indecent images of children last year”.

However, it is inconceivable to think that Billingham would not be allowed to come up with some pluses yet based on what I know and what I have been told, former Chief Nonce, Bent Hodder, of the Essex Police Homosexual Division was fortunate to get off with being charged so lightly and – given his occupation & rank –  was extremely fortunate to only be handed down a piss-taking six-month jail term, suspended for two years, and ordered to pay a £1,200 fine… As well as having to sign on the sex offenders’ register for seven years of course.

Billingham further stated in regard to Hod-No-Longer-Plod that: “The force published the full details on the force website and on Twitter and ensured that the local media was able to quickly and accurately report the facts.”

Did it fuck!

In fact what the Farce did was totally understate the severity of Ex-Plodder Hodder’s crime and indeed to find a more accurate breakdown of what was involved you need to go to the UK Database Online Sex Offenders Register website:

A senior officer with Essex police caught with indecent images of underage boys he had chatted up on social media sites was spared jail today (FRI).

Ben Hodder, 34, former district commander for Thurrock, was sent pictures of a naked 15-year-old by a 16-year-old, who had been chatting with the police chief on social network site

He had also saved four indecent images of another 15-year-old whose identity was never discovered.

The court heard that in April, 2014, the authorities became aware of photographs after a boy (who cannot be named for legal reasons) spoke to his mother about conversations that he was having on internet chat rooms.

After the police analysed the electronic communications, they traced a number of matters to Hodder.

Hodder was arrested at his Chafford Hundred home in April, 2014.

The court heard that one of the images was a Category B image and four were of Category C. All made between November and December, 2013.

Speaking in mitigation of Hodder, barrister, Allan Compton said: “This is a huge fail from grace for my client…a personal tragedy. He is still a serving police officer but his dismissal is simply a matter of time.

“On searching his premises, the police seized I-Pads, cameras and computers but although the hard drive revealed thousands of filmed images, they were all legal images.

He pleaded guilty at Snaresbrook Crown Court to the charge of making category B and C images of a child.

Hodder, who looked stricken in the dock, pleaded not guilty to the charge of making of category A images. 

Hodder was finally sacked by Chief Knob, Stephen Kavanagh for “gross misconduct“. Therefore, the next time you read about a Bacon-Bugger being sacked for gross misconduct bear in mind that the plod in question could well be a kiddie-fiddler.

Photo: Pervert Plod, Bent Hodder

And indeed, whilst he was at it Kavanagh sacked another Rayleigh based Sex-Case-Copper:

PC Stephen Tilley, 36, from Rayleigh, was also dismissed after being admitting misconduct in a public office. He was given a 22-month prison sentence, suspended for a year, and ordered to complete 240 hours of unpaid community work. Source

Course, Hodder isn’t the first high-wanking Essex Police-Chief to be exposed as a nonce:

A police inspector has been jailed for five years for sexually abusing a schoolgirl.

Richard Croft, 50, pleaded guilty to six offences between 1992 and 1996, including having sex with the teenager when she was under 14.

He was arrested after the girl, now an adult, went to the police last year.

Stephen Dyble, prosecuting, told Ipswich crown court that the girl “made a series of efforts to commit suicide”.

Father-of-two Croft, previously from Brentwood, Essex, now lives in Lincoln.

Which makes perfect sense that he should now live there given the information coming up… Do carry on for now Mr Copy-Writer:

He worked in the Essex force for 20 years and was suspended after his arrest.

He quit earlier this week. Source

PHOTO: Dick Croft

However, it would appear to be a case of “least said, soonest mended” for the wholly corrupt, paedophile infested, Essex Bacon.

You see, yet another Herbert who worked out of Rayleigh Pig-Pen has also recently been given the old tin-tack for gross misconduct.

Which is nice since I was under the impression that “gross misconduct” is a must for any ambitious Orifficer wishing to climb to the bottom of the cess-pit:

A POLICE officer who had “inappropriate communications” with two vulnerable women has been sacked for gross misconduct.

PC Rhys Woolner, who was based in Rayleigh, was dismissed by Essex Police after a panel found he communicated with two women following separate incidents between August 2015 and October 2015.

After the hearing, Assistant Chief Constable Maurice Mason said: “Public trust in policing depends on the honesty and integrity of police officers being beyond reproach.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha “the honesty and integrity of police officers” ha ha ha, as if, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha – Mason Mo Mason must be on fucking crack cocaine mustn’t he?

“The honesty and integrity of police officers” indeed… What a joker… Gerron wi’it:

“When officers fall below that level and breach those professional standards, we take it very seriously.

And promote them presumably?

“There can be no greater failing by a police officer then to abuse their position to exploit a vulnerable person.

“His conduct fell so far below the standards expected of my officers that I had no hesitation in dismissing him for discreditable conduct.

“The public can be reassured that there is no place in Essex Police for people who breach the Standards of Professional Behaviour in this way.”

But it is fine as long as standards are only breached in other ways… Roger that.

The panel, led by independent legally qualified chair Alexandra Ward, ruled Mr Woolner breached the standards of professional behaviour in the areas of authority, respect and courtesy, and discreditable conduct. Source

PHOTO: Mason Mo Mason… Perhaps?

Now it is quite clearly obvious that no lessons had been learned whatsoever. In fact the truth of the matter is that far from improving; the Essex Police Farce are constantly deteriorating in performance thanks to the likes Defective Cunstable Lee Pollard sacked from the Essex Police Farce in September 2015:

A detective based in the Child Abuse Investigations Team has been dismissed from Essex Police for gross misconduct.

Dc Lee Pollard was found to have breached standards of behaviour in relation to honesty and integrity and confidentiality by a panel chaired by Assistant Chief Constable Maurice Mason.

In October 2013, Dc Pollard accessed, copied and disclosed another officer’s computerised application for a job promotion without the individual’s permission and then disclosed it to another officer who was considering applying for the same post.

Dc Pollard accepted he had breached the standards of honesty and integrity and confidentiality and he was dismissed without notice when the panel announced its decision following a hearing on Monday, September 14. Source

The following month – October 2015 – saw PC Mark Watts resigning ahead of getting the old tin-tack:

A dog handler with Essex Police has resigned just before having to face a disciplinary hearing.

PC Mark Watts is alleged to have “breached the standards of professional behaviour in the areas of honesty and integrity, discreditable conduct and duties and responsibilities” whilst serving at the dog unit in Sandon.

The hearing was due to be held at the county court in Chelmsford, chaired by Mark Gilmartin on October 19, but was cancelled as the officer has resigned.

Mark Watts has now been placed on disapproved register which keeps details of officers who have resigned or retired whilst facing gross misconduct charges. Source

PHOTO: Mark Watts

And in the same month & year Essex Police worker Ian Black was convicted of possessing Category A: Indecent Images Of Children:

A BOYS’ BRIGADE volunteer who spent a decade downloading child abuse images has been spared jail.

Ian Black, 54, of Yare Avenue in Witham, was found guilty of possessing nearly 8,000 indecent images of girls as young as two experiencing the highest level of vile abuse “within minutes” at his two-day trial last month.

Black worked for Essex Police for several years, volunteered with the boys’ brigade in Witham and was actively involved in the community.

But at the same time he would take pictures of children in playgrounds, and download ghastly images of children being abused

Black admitted four counts of making or downloading indecent images of children and a jury found him guilty of another six counts unanimously and within minutes. Continue Reading

Indeed Black looks every inch the sick-fuck he really is:

Yet by the time that those two were sacked the Essex Farce was already subject to the following:

The IPCC has issued 25 notices to serving Essex Police officers and a further four notices have been issued to former Essex Police personnel who have either resigned or retired advising them they are being investigated.

IPCC investigators have now completed issuing the notices and have written to the victims, or their families, to update them of this development.

All of the officers being investigated are ranked under ACPO rank, which is Chief Superintendent and below.

Of the notices, 22 allege gross misconduct and seven relate to alleged misconduct matters. These include:

• failing to make reasonable enquiries and progress investigations;
• failing to address victim safeguarding; and
• concerns regarding honesty and integrity issues in relation to how some investigations were carried out.

Six of the officers are also being criminally investigated for alleged offences including misconduct in public office and perverting the course of justice.

Serving a police officer with a notice advises them their conduct is subject to investigation, it does not indicate or prejudge any outcome of the investigation.  Source

Laughably, at that time back in 2015 the now former Essex PCC, Nick Alston had the following to say:

“I will continue to be entirely open and clear with the people of Essex about the importance of protecting our children and other vulnerable members of our communities. This is an absolute priority”.

Yet also at that time, Alston had ignored the public completel by refusing to involve himself in the serious [evidenced] crimes and abuse that the Essex Bacon were (and still are) committing against me and my family. see HERE

I know what you did Mr Meecham

And predictably, the bent bastard wasn’t forthcoming about how his Essex Police-Farce really operates in order to keep buried the true state of perversity, criminality & corruption which is indeed running prevalent throughout the UK Cuntstabulary as a whole.

You see, Honest Nick was not only [the then] Essex PCC , tasked with the job of making sure that the Essex Police were beyond reproach…


… he was also the Chief Cuntstable of Lincolnshire, Neil Rhodes… Or at least his photos were.


Any photo experts who can refute the above then please do because as far as I can see those photos are either indisputable proof of a very serious crime or a coincidence with odds far greater than 7 billion to 2 – the accepted given odds of two people in the world being identical. 

Indeed, the fact that the photo quality – in this day and age – is so bad in the case of Alston’s professionally taken photo above, that you can only conclude that the reason for it being such is partly in an effort to hide the digital alterations that have taken place and partly a direct consequence of those alterations.

And when you catch on to this widespread practice of digitally altering media photos – which extends far, far beyond what could be described as a “touch up” – you can be left in no doubt that the ONLY credible reason that these professionally taken photos are altered, has to be for criminal purposes.

Mind you, that cropping of Alston’s ear and extending of his teeth, along with the lowering of the bottom eyelid and changing of the eye colour is enough to drop the computer comparison percentage between the pair, to just 72 %.


Thus adding credence to my claim that a 75% or over score would indicate that the two people being compared are likely to be one and the same – thus warranting further investigation.

And obviously the less alterations that have been made to the photos selected for comparison purposes makes for a higher comparison score if those being compared are one and the same… Like we see below in fact.


Yet some of the alterations made by the monster minions are so dire and the ‘falsies‘ worn by the actors are that ridiculous that I am fucked if I know why this practice wasn’t picked up on much sooner… Here have a butchers at this next photo-batch:


Indeed just look at the photo below and tell me that Alston is the personification of someone charged with ensuring a County Constabulary’s integrity.


Certainly not my idea that is for sure… And why the fuck does his nose keep changing?

Nevertheless, to get back on track let me tell you that in November 2015, yet another Defective was sacked by Steve-o Kavanagh for “gross misconduct:

An Essex Police detective has been sacked for gross misconduct at a private hearing this week.

Detective Constable Pete Coley was dismissed from the force for breaching standards of professional behaviour in terms of “discreditable conduct and orders and instructions”.

Chief Constable Stephen Kavanagh chaired a special case hearing at Harlow County Court on, Monday, November 2, into the conduct of Dc Coley.

The hearing was due to be held in public was made private at the request of the complainant. Source

Moreover, that very same month saw Essex PC Mark Smith go too:

An Essex Police officer has been dismissed for gross misconduct after not investigating a reported rape properly.

A panel chaired by temporary Deputy Chief Constable Julia Wortley found that Pc Mark Smith breached standards of professional behaviour relating to “honesty and integrity, duties and responsibilities, and discreditable conduct”. Source

As did the racist thug PC Jon Williams who was based at my home from home, namely Southend Central Pig-Pen:

An officer has been dismissed from Essex Police after sending racist and homophobic text messages and breaching standards of professional behaviour.

Pc Jonathan Williams left the force after a special case hearing at Harlow County Court today, Monday, November 2, which was chaired by Chief Constable Stephen Kavanagh.

The hearing was told Pc Williams, who was based at Southend, had sent racist and homophobic text messages.

He had also made offensive remarks towards a woman known to him. Source


In September 2016 PC Simon Lofting was dismissed – once again for gross misconduct:

A COLCHESTER cop has been dismissed from Essex Police after a misconduct panel found his behaviour had amounted to “gross misconduct”.

PC Simon Lofting denied six breaches of professional standards.

The panel found that, between 2014 and 2015, PC Simon Lofting, who worked in the force’s marine unit, intentionally misled Essex Police officers about the purpose of a request for information. Source

PHOTO: Simon Lofting

And so on and so on, but I’m sure you get the picture.

So, let’s get back to that article covering Zoe Billingham’s report – which continued thus:

However, inspectors were concerned at top brass’s ability to deal with corruption.

It said: “The force has a corruption control strategy; however it is of limited value and requires further development to be comprehensive and effective.

“The current document amounts to a one-page summary of the three most vulnerable areas, we found that the strategy currently lacks reference to prevention, intelligence-gathering or enforcement. It is therefore incomplete.

“A further area of concern is the force’s lack of capability and capacity to carry out effective monitoring of the use of every computer system.”

In October, Det Con Darren Paterson, who worked at Essex Police’s College, was dismissed for using computer systems to view, or attempt to view, confidential information.

He had also failed to disclose true and complete details on vetting forms.

And of course as long as the corrupt top brass are allowed to continue, then corruption among the lower wanks will never be dealt with… It ain’t Rocket Salad y’know:

OVERALL victim satisfaction with Essex Police is falling.

The report also found that while 88.5 per cent of all victims of crime (excluding hate crime) were satisfied with the overall treatment provided by the force, this was lower than the England and Wales average of 93.4 percent.

It was also lower than the 92.2 percent who were satisfied with the overall treatment that the force provided in the 12 months to 31 March 2015.

The authors called this a “statistically significant difference”.

SENIOR leaders at Essex Police broadly welcomed the reports, which are equivalent to a good Ofsted report for a school.

Chief Constable Stephen Kavanagh said…

This will be good…

“Being a police officer is a privilege and it’s crucial that we use and are seen to use our policing powers fairly and with respect”.

HUH? Where exactly have I been treated fairly and with respect by the privileged arseholes?

Indeed long before even half of the shit that they have aimed at me had taken place, a solicitor named Fiona Ide, working for Russell Law – whom I had approached before my second illegal arrest – replied thus to an email that I had sent in regard to my first illegal arrest:

 The barrister whom I asked to consider your case has now replied. He has said that, on your account and the documents he has seen so far, you would have a claim for wrongful arrest, false imprisonment and trespass. He asked me point out that success is by no means guaranteed but, if you want us to take the case on, we will do our best for you.

And things got a lot, lot more underhand and criminal after that. So, for anyone who is unaware of that police harassment aimed at me and my family I suggest that you educate yourselves by first reading:

Followed by:

Course, it is obvious that I am once again on the solicitors blacklist because I can’t get a solicitor to even talk to me about suing the mob… But I will.

Nevertheless, the article on the Billingham report then concludes with the thoughts of Roger Hirst – the current Essex PCC:

Roger Hirst, Police and Crime Commissioner (PCC) for Essex, said the force will continue to make improvements.

He said: “This demonstrates that under the leadership of chief constable Stephen Kavanagh, Essex Police is taking real strides forward in becoming a police force that listens to the public and puts victims first.

“I recognise nevertheless that more needs to be done to give the public greater confidence, particularly in relation to local policing and in ensuring that the diversity of the workforce of Essex Police better reflects the communities that it serves.

“These are important issues that the chief constable and I take very seriously.” Source

That dozy twat must have been reading a different report or the Essex Plod have now hired Alistair Campbell.

Meanwhile, it seems that the far from upstanding Stephen Kavanagh lost out to the equally far from upstanding Cressida Dicks for the post of Metropolitan Police Commissioner:

ESSEX’S top cop has been unsuccessful in a bid to become the head of the Metropolitan police.

Chief constable of Essex Police, Steven Kavanagh, applied to take on the Metropolitan Police commissioner job which is the most senior post in British policing. 

He was one four senior figures seen as being in the running to succeed Sir Bernard Hogan-Howe as head of Scotland Yard, including Cressida Dick, Sara Thornton, Mark Rowley and Stephen Kavanagh.

But today Cressida Dick has been named as the new head of Scotland Yard, becoming the first woman to hold the post. Source

Yet I would have thought that Mr Kavanagh was ideal for the job.

After all, he is currently being investigated for corruption:

One of the frontrunners for British policing’s biggest job is being investigated for allegedly failing to examine claims that corrupt officers covered up a suspected gangland murder.

Stephen Kavanagh, the chief constable of Essex police, who is expected to apply to run Scotland Yard, was served with notice of a misconduct investigation after a complaint by the family of a 33-year-old man killed on a farm linked to drug and gun crime. Source

I do like the way that Les Bakewell’s death has now become a “suspected gangland murder“!

Moreover, I know for a fact just from my own experience alone that the not so upstanding Mr Kavanagh has no qualms about abusing his position for a desired conclusion (see HERE & HERE).

And he also like to drink heavily from the fatted cow:

A failing chief constable claims tens of thousands of pounds in ‘allowances’ for his designer home, daily food bills and private car.

Essex chief constable Stephen Kavanagh is one of the highest paid UK police bosses with a pay package of more than £200,000.

Yet the officer – whose force has been rated ‘inadequate’ at protecting the vulnerable – claimed £32,000 in ‘allowances’ on top of his salary last year.

Part of this was £17,600 for a ‘chief officer allowance’. The only reference to this payment was buried in a footnote in the force’s accounts.

When asked about it, a force spokesman clarified that the ‘chief officer allowance’ was for Mr Kavanagh’s home internet and phone bills, private medical insurance, and contributions to his lunches, coffees and snacks.

This money is provided without him needing to provide receipts or proof of expenditure.

Incredibly, this perk – also handed to members of his senior team – has not stopped Mr Kavanagh making extra ‘subsistence’ claims on his taxpayer-funded expenses. 

These include dinner bills of up to £93 a time, and Tube tickets worth £4.50.

His expenses also include a £6,900 taxpayer-funded ‘housing allowance’ towards his sprawling five-bedroom home in Essex, which is worth nearly £1million and has a kitchen crafted by top designer Nicholas Anthony.

Finally, Mr Kavanagh accepted a huge pay rise last year of more than £26,000. 

This increase could have paid the entire salary of one of the 571 Essex police officers who have lost their jobs since 2010 following budget cuts. 

The chief constable’s total pay package last year, including the rise and allowances, was £237,000 – nearly £100,000 more than the Prime Minister’s salarySource

He surely has to be a cowcaholic.

But leave him alone – he’s only little.

However, for further reading on Kavanagh, Alston & the Essex Police Farce click HERE

And that is just about your lot except to say thank you once again to all of you who have donated, and because of those donations I would feel guilty for putting this article out as an eBook first before publish it on here… So I haven’t.

I can also tell you that there is a massive article nearing completion which links together just about every high-profile murder and/or abduction that has taken place in the UK from as far back as the 1960’s… It should in fact have been completed by now but it just keeps growing and growing.

However, needs must, so that one will have to be released as an eBook first – as will the third and last installment of my Diana Trilogy, which is also now nearing completion.

You can subscribe for free to my eBooks by clicking the following link:

It also appears that some of you are now having difficulty getting your donations onto the poor-man’s Go-Fucking-Fund-Me page that was set up for me… Why am I not surprised?

Nevertheless, I would urge all those of you having difficulties to keep trying as you all know what I am up against and having seen what has come in via the Go-Fucking-Fund-Me pages, the reality of the situation remains that I am still skint as fuck… You can find that page by clicking HERE

That’s it… Mustache… Byyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee