Turbo Charged

Spiv and Chimps

 

There is a very short news item in the Chimp this morning about a fella, allegedly dressed as Pudsey the Bear who walked into a pub and started collecting for ‘Children in Need’.

Lets have a read:

Hunt for ‘conman’ in a Pudsey onesie who took money from pub drinkers but fled when they confronted him over his photocopied identity card

  • Suspected conman ‘pretended’ to raise money for Children in Need
  • Dressed as Pudsey Bear, he went around a pub asking for donations
  • Regulars became suspicious after spotting dodgy ‘identification’ card

Wearing a grubby yellow onesie, this is a suspected conman who ‘pretended’ to raise money for Children in Need dressed as Pudsey Bear.

So he was in a dirty old costume… Not the best start to his fund raising then.

Pub regulars photographed the middle-aged man after he started asking drinkers for donations.

Like fund raisers do when they go around pubs and clubs collecting for charidy.

They became suspicious when the balding collector’s ‘identification’ appeared to be a photocopied BBC card bearing the name Ron Smith.

Did he show his I.D to everyone then? I mean, I don’t go to pubs as a general rule but when I did, when fundraisers came in they would approach the landlord and ask his permission – and woe betide anyone who didn’t.

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Regulars photographed the man, right, after he started asking drinkers for donations dressed as Pudsey Bear

Now you will notice that the photo caption does not actually say that ‘Pudsey’ is the fella in costume in the first photo, although I am inclined to take it that he isn’t since it is a pretty good costume and looks fuck all like the one that the villain of the piece is wearing… His is crap, but did no one get a photo of him with his Pudsey head on?

After all, someone got a very good photo of his I.D

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Regulars became suspicious when the balding collector’s ‘identification’ appeared to be a photocopied BBC card bearing the name Ron Smith, pictured

Well they jolly well would get suspicious wouldn’t they… After all, it is a fucking crap forgery.

Moments after being confronted, the man – who was with a woman – fled the Red Lion pub in Stifford’s Bridge, near Worcester. 

Yeah but who confronted him?

The incident came three days before the BBC1 fundraising appeal starts tonight featuring Rod Stewart, Selena Gomez and Ellie Goulding.

Its a secret then… Still, I feel sure that outraged citizens will make up for the loss.

One drinker said: ‘The bloke’s costume was a tatty old yellow onesie and his ID card was dodgy to say the least. The email address wasn’t even complete.

Well technically it is stealing from adults but if his bucket looked pretty full, a lorra, lorra people must have been fooled.

The pub has now launched a Facebook appeal in a bid to catch him.

And a Chimp appeal too by looks of things.

West Mercia Police yesterday confirmed they were investigating the incident. Source

In that case I can help because the fella, despite having a dodgy ear attached to one side of his head and someone having ‘ironed’ his nose, he is still without doubt the gangster come actor Terry Stone AKA Terry Turbo.

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Don’t cha get sick of being taken for a cunt?

No wonder no bastard at the Chimp is prepared to put their name to the old fanny.

Just sayin’.