Tuna Fishy As Fuck.


Chris Spivey


Nearly two weeks ago the British Mafia Government ordered British holiday-makers out of Tunisia in scenes almost reminiscent of the American evacuation of Saigon.

And according to the MSM “thousands” complied, which since there was only an estimated 2500-3000 Brits over there, that would equate to most of the silly bastards.

Fuck me, how Cameron & Co must have rubbed their hands together in glee at the mass compliance of the spineless, mushy-pea brained Brits, following the announcement of their blatant whopper about another Tunisian Terrapin attack being imminent… I’m fucked if I would have cut short my holiday.

I mean had the general public had any sense left whatsoever, they would have cottoned on to the government bullshit at least as quick as what us ‘crazies’ did, especially those on holiday who ended up in the thick of it… Not that it was too thick that it was hard to see through the old fanny.

I mean, 30 out of the 38 ‘dead victims’ were British, so are we meant to believe that nearly 80 percent of Tunisian holidaymakers come from England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland?

Fuck me, if that is the case then the Tunisian government should have been flying all British holidaymakers home with a trunk full of gold each, by way of compensation.

Yet all the soft twats had to do was take a moment to look at the facts and it would have – or at least should have – quickly sunk in that they were being taken for mugs.

I mean, fuck me they didn’t even need to know the predictable indicators that point to a hoax having taken place although as hoaxes go, this Tunisian bollocks had the fucking lot:

  • Heroes, selflessly giving up their lives
  • Unbelievable, heartbreaking stories
  • Poor quality film and photographs
  • People in the vicinity of exploding grenades with tiny scratches
  • People shot multiple times sitting up in bed looking healthier than I do on a good day
  • Unbelievable strokes of good luck
  • People overcome with outpourings of grief for people they don’t know from Adam
  • Doppelgangers of people caught up in other hoaxes
  • OTT reporting
  • Ever changing version of events.

After all, giving mind to that last criteria, the old bollox started with eyewitnesses stating that there were three gunmen who accessed the beach via boat and then jet ski’s. Three were then reduced to one by the MSM, with the now lone-wolf Super-Terrapin lobbing grenades here there and every-fucking-where in the hotel.

And lets face it, we know that his lob-on took him an hour or so to complete because there was plenty of witness testimony to back the fact up – including that of the people who hid in a room for over 5 hours… Which must mean that the mental deficient Tunisian Police are not just slow, they must also be a very lapsy daisy bunch of village idiots if after 5 hours of hiding the pair emerged through their own choosing .

Never the less, after discharging hundreds of rounds of rapid fire and exploded at least 3 grenades, Super-Tel then went on a 10 or 15 minute walkabout which was filmed in glorious Techni-Bad, by one of the dozen or so witnesses shadowing the well armed dangerous Terrapin, all of whom presumably froze like statues every time Super-Tel turned to look behind him… As he must of surely done to make sure that no one was daft enough to follow him… You couldn’t make this shit up.

But big up the waiter who was going to tackle Terry the terrapin with a big fuck-off, errrr, well an ashtray actually.

tunisiabeachAll that is missing from that photo is Acker Bilk playing ‘Stranger on the Shore’.

In fact fuck it, there ya go:

And once he had done his tour of the beach, Super-Tel had a wander down the road where a roof tiler waited for his moment and dropped a load of tiles on Super-Tel’s bonce… After which he presumably got up and carried on his journey until he was shot dead by an Alien from Mars… Or the Tunisian Village Idiots, I had in fact lost the will to live by that time and wasn’t really paying attention to the plot… Which obviously didn’t include any “THEY’RE BEHIND YOU” audience participation.


The bottom photo is somewhat different to the first wouldn’t you say? Or are we not supposed to remark on the blue square edged bus-stop type sign post and the mysterious disappearing plant?

Nevertheless, everything has all changed in the official version now so I suppose that first photo could have been where he was shot dead in the original screenplay.

You see, it would now seem that Terry the Terrapin didn’t arrive on a jet ski – like a boss – at all… His mate Fred gave him a lift in his van:

This is the chilling moment Islamic State terrorists dropped gunman Seifeddine Rezgui off in a quiet side street, minutes before he murdered 30 British tourists in Tunisia.

The Mail on Sunday can reveal dramatic CCTV footage captured the 23-year-old fanatic arriving in a white van – 300 yards from the scene of the horrific massacre in Sousse.

A camera at a holiday rental apartment filmed Rezgui arriving as a passenger in the Peugeot Partner van at 11.12am on June 26.

Dressed in a black T-shirt and shorts, he strolls away from the car and turns left, heading towards the beach with a parasol under his arm, under which he had hidden the Kalashnikov rifle he used to kill 38 holidaymakers and maim dozens 40 minutes later.

Police officers in Tunisia have launched a nationwide hunt for the vehicle and its occupants in the belief that it holds the key to Rezgui’s movements in the days leading up to the atrocity, which has seen thousands of British tourists evacuated from the country in recent days.

The emergence of the picture dispels the theory that Rezgui was a ‘lone wolf’ attacker when he rampaged through the Imperial Marhaba hotel in the resort of Port El Kantaoui, as well as early reports that he arrived on the beach alone by boat or jet ski.

Security services now believe he was part of a large IS cell operating in Tunisia and are hunting 62 suspected militants who conspired with him to plan and carry out the attack. 

Seven men and a woman – believed to be Rezgui’s lover – have been arrested and continue to be held in Tunis on suspicion of helping to orchestrate the brutal murders.

A police chief told The Mail on Sunday: ‘The car is a very significant part of the investigation and we are searching all of Tunisia for it.’ 

One theory is that the vehicle may have been driven across the border to Libya, but officers are said to be keeping an open mind about its whereabouts.

This newspaper has established that the CCTV image was captured by a camera at Residence El Olfa, a block of 12 holiday apartments usually rented by Algerian tourists. 

The owner of the flats, who declined to be named, said he was unaware the footage police had taken from his security cameras had captured Rezgui’s arrival on June 26. Source

This is the moment Tunisian gunman Rezgui was dropped off by an accomplice 300 yards from the beach massacre.Rezgui can be seen leaving the quiet side street after being dropped off in a white Peugeot Partner van 40 minutes before his murderous rampage in Sousse on June 26. The gunman can be seen at the top of the image carrying the parasol in which he had hidden the Kalashnikov rifle he used to kill 38 holidaymakers, including 30 Britons and three Irish tourists. Police are still hunting for the car, which they believe is key in establishing Rezgui's movements in the days before the attack and the people who helped him. ***INTERNET IMAGE TAKEN FROM LOCAL WEBSITE alikhbariaattounisia.com***

I’m ever so glad that people pointed out that I’m a cunt for doubting the story, because it really, really did happen, don’t cha know… Boy do I feel fucking silly now.

Course, being a bit fucking slow on the uptake, I now find myself proper confused.

I mean, when Selfridge Rizla or whatever Terry the Terrapins name is launched the attack after arriving on the beach via jet ski, I could then understand how after finishing shooting the beach dwellers he then moved to the hotel pool area to do the do, after which he moved into the hotel, spent an hour or so in there slinging grenades about, before exiting the hotel, strolling down the road and getting shot dead by the plod after first being knocked doolally by a load of roof tiles.

And that scenario is more or less the same one as is described in the following photo:


But this new story of Selfridge getting dropped off by Fred makes no fucking sense whatsoever. I mean are we just supposed to ignore those witnesses who swear blind that the Terrapins (plural) came in via jet skies?

Yet even if we do ignore those many reports, and say;“yeah, fair enough, Selfridge got dropped off by Fred”, that then begs the question of how the fuck did he get onto the beach?

After all, it is quite obvious that the attack area is a private beach belonging to the hotel. I mean, hotels do not provide thatched roofed permanent sun parasols complete with sun loungers for all and sundry to enjoy.

Riu-Imperial-Marhaba-1_1435393066 (1)

Fuck me, imagine how many sun loungers the hotel would have left by the end of the week if the beach was accessible to all?

So, I am confused as to how Selfridge, carrying his own parasol got onto the beach in the first place? And why did he not start in the hotel and work his way down to the beach?… How did 3 become 1? These details cannot be broadcast and then simply dispensed with.

You cannot imagine one person being three unless all of the holidaymakers were langers by lunch.

In fact you cannot imagine that you saw three terrapins arrive on jet skies, only to be told later that no one arrived that way – it was just the one fella who got dropped off round the front by Fred… Can you not see how fucking stupid this pantomime has become?

And if the whole script changes then how the fuck can we believe that 30 Brits were murdered?

Now I have already been through some of the tall tales given by the casualties in my article “where do we go from here”, which can be found by clicking on the LINK

Mind you, when I said that Tuna Fish casualty, Ross Thomas was in fact also Ross Lorraine, a much used government actor, I don’t think many of you were convinced… Despite the clue being in the name.


Obviously Thomas is the fat fuck in the blue pajamas.

Indeed some of you even went so far as to voice your doubt at my methods of comparing faces and further suggested that I use some kind of facial recognition software – which although a fair comment still seemed a bit daft to me because most of the images of these actors have always been altered in some way, I.E. ears have been reshaped, or eyes have been made wider etc, etc.

Take Jihadi John for instance – who wouldn’t you just fucking know, only went to the same Terrapin Training School as Selfridge Rizla.



Nevertheless, never let it be said that I am blinkered and not open to constructive suggestions, because I have indeed taken the advice onboard and had a bash on one of those same face or not websites, which obviously compare two faces for likeness.

And just so ya know, ya know, when two faces are compared and judged as being 50% the same likeness on this particular site that I used, the two faces are classed as being “not a million miles apart”.

At 75% the same likeness, the website describes the two people being compared as being; “Twins”

And as such, anything above that – when added to my matching visual evidence – kinda puts the odds on that person being one and the same, if they have of course, both cropped up in other government sponsored hoaxes and MSM tall fucking tales.

Fair comment? Of course it fucking is.

Therefore, on the rare occasions that there is a 100% comparison match on the site, you are without doubt comparing two photos of yourself (or two photos of the same person anyway)… This is made all the more evident by the fact that even when comparing two photos of yourself – a 100 % match is not a forgone conclusion.

mee5And when it comes to family resemblance, well I have 3 brothers whom I share the same two parents with.


Good that isn’t it?

And when we put Ross Thomas in with Ross Lorraine, what percentage match do we get?


Nuff said… Well, no it is not actually.


Funnily enough there were plenty who branded me as being “mental” for claiming that the Glasgow Bin-Lorry Bollox was a government sponsored hoax – despite the mountain of irrefutable evidence that I put forward to prove it.

Indeed, the nay-sayers only counter argument was/is: “If it is a hoax, what benefit is there to the government”.

And in asking that pathetic question, they show themselves up as being the ones who are wired up wrong – not me. After all, you don’t need a motive to prove a crime.

Course, many tried slating me because they are paid to pour scorn on myself and other whistleblowers… In other words they really are scum, nonces who would sell their mother to the highest bidder… Indeed, it is a matter of public record that some of them have been certified as mental.

Don’t cha just hate hypocrisy?

Others slated me because they cannot see further than the end of their noses. In other word, they are what you would call frightened, spineless cowards who lack vision and the “mental” faculties needed to process the most basic of facts… Unfortunately, together the two groups will ultimately be the downfall of the human race.


I should also point out that I have other 100% carbon copy clones of others who are supposedly two different people… Unfortunately, I am forbidden from showing you.


Course, there are also loads of Tuna Fish Victims that I haven’t covered, who are obviously actors. Mrs Mellor for instance:


Speaking from her intensive care bed two days ago, mother-of-two Mrs Mellor said: ‘He pointed the gun at me and he shot me twice, once in the leg, once in the hand. I thought ‘This is it, I’m going to die’. Source

The cunts just don’t care! I mean if you are well enough to be interviewed by the press then you are far too healthy to be in intensive care… Not that you end up in intensive care if you get shot in the hand and leg. A friend of mine once shot another friend of mine through the leg.

He was nowhere near ready for intensive care in fact he was hopping fucking mad – literally. It has also left an unmissable, big fuck off scar on both the front and back of his leg too, so to tell us that the people we are seeing in the photos attached to the articles that have already gone past overkill is an insult to any sane thinkers intelligence.


Nevertheless, one ‘victims’ story that really stands out and as such I feel that I have to bring up following her role in this Tunisian bollox is that of Allison Heathcote.


PHOTO: Allison Heathcote leaves hospital.

Now unfortunately the Monkey-Kuntz must have even been embarrassed by their cringe inducing article about Allison Heathcote that carried a headline along the lines of SHOT TOO MANY TIMES TO COUNT THE HOLES SAYS TUNA-FISH DOCTOR, because they have banished it to hell where it belongs.

Course, the fact that the accompanying photos in that article showed a different story altogether and included an interview with someone alleging to be Heathcote’s brother who stated that she had been shot twice, sort of showed the Monkey-Boyz up for the pathetic, useless, arsewipes that they really are.

Nevertheless, remnants of that laughable article still remain albeit with alterations to the alleged brothers comments:

An anaesthetist who treated her said of her condition: ‘She has many gunshots in her abdomen, too many to count. She lost so much blood.’

Family say she was shot twice in the arm, shattering a bone into 18 pieces, and another five times to her body, with bullets miraculously missing vital organs. Source

However, call it intuition if ya like, but I had a sneaky fucking suspicion that the article would be removed once the damage had been done. And by that I mean, the bullshite was removed once the brain-fried dumb-fuck population had soaked up the horrific detail of Heathcotes injuries – thus making what [didn’t] took place on the beach all the more terrifying in their tiny minds.

And because of that feeling that I had about the article only being temporary, I took a screenshot… Go me, round of applause purleazzzze.


How photoshopped is that photo? The fella in the black trousers has his right leg in the pocket of the fella in the orange shorts!

Mind you, the fella in the orange shorts must be a contortionist to bend like that… And funnily enough I once knew a gay contortionist who fell over and got up himself.

But I take it that everyone’s okay with the Chimp modifying Heathcote’s brother’s bullet tally to bring it more in line with the lying cunt anaesthetists amateur approach to medical science? … I’m fucking not!

Yet in reality, Allison Heathcotes multiple invisible bullet wounds were nothing more than a photo shoot opportunity for the press.

Now bear in mind that your Abdomen is not your lower back so Heathcote had to have been shot in the front otherwise she would have been described as shot in the lower back with the bullets penetrating her abdomen… Also bear in mind that it was a doctor – an anaesthetist no less who not only treated her but would need to know exactly what he was dealing with in order to anesthetise her – who stated that:  ‘She has many gunshots in her abdomen, too many to count. She lost so much blood.’

Of course, the press must know that nothing of the sort happened to Fatty Heathcote – as you are about to see. Yet they still published regardless of the damage that this old fanny is going to do to our future prospects.

Okay lets look at the photoshoot and I should warn you that I have included some snaps of what really happens to the body when you get shot by a Kalashnikov Assault Rifle.

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Yet even then the scriptwriters quite brazenly changed their minds again about Heathcotes injuries… You see she is now down to 3 gut shots and two shoulder shots:

“She had been shot five times – three to the abdomen, which missed her vital organs, and twice in the shoulder. “It has been a very distressing time for us all. “If I were to make any comment about Philip it would be an assumption but we are not expecting good news. “It’s very sombre out there.”  Source

It isn’t exactly a bowl of fucking cherries in here either old son.

Incidentally, that Mirror article also carries the original timeline with Selfridge Rizla coming in by jet ski and his first shooting being a paraglider – stop playing the ‘Die Hard‘ video games for fucks sake boys. Even I am embarrassed for you:

11:55: Gunman Seifeddine Rezgui arrives on the beach at Port el-Kantaoui either by boat or jet-ski, according to eye-witnesses.

12:00: Rezgui strolls along the beach, seemingly unnoticed by tourists and sunbathers, with his Kalashnikov rifle hidden in a parasol.

12:05: The gunman opens fire. Eye-witness reports say he first shot a paraglider before turning the weapon on tourists lying on sunloungers.

So as I am sure you will appreciate it is extremely hard for me to understand how “eyewitnesses” – note plural – could see such events unfolding when it would seem that no such events took place… That kinda shit cannot be put down to witness confusion.

I find it even harder to understand how – despite Terry the Terrapin not living to confess all – the old plod know by name and faces, the two fellas that were Selfridges accomplices to the Dick Dastardly deed:

An alleged accomplice of the crazed Tunisian gunman who shot 38 innocent tourists dead is trying to smuggle himself into Europe, his family said. 

Rafikhe Tayari, who has been described by police as dangerous, is thought to have assisted Seifeddine Rezgui carry out the massacre in Sousse on Friday. 

The 28-year-old’s family have now revealed he is in Libya seeking a migrant boat across the Mediterranean. He is being hunted along with another suspect, Mohamed bin Abdallah. 

The news comes as it was revealed that 30 British tourists were killed in the attack.

Tayari’s father, Mohammad, a 48-year-old taxi driver from Tunis, insisted his son was innocent.

He said: ‘The police know he’s in Libya. I don’t understand why they have got to terrorise us and raid our house. Source

OHHHH, the family confessed… Like ya do.

There are also another two terrapins who are worth mentioning, although I can’t for the life of me remember where they came from – my bad. Nevertheless I am sure that they have some connection somewhere to this old bollox.

And in regard to these two Terrapins, the frauds in government who openly admit to being responsible for creating these and other bogeymen can put as much shadowing as they want on one of the two, but my excellent eye still tells me that they are one and the same and in all probability Selfridge Rizla to boot.


And for no other reason than to placate the nay-sayers, The Computer says:


That will be six exact doppelgangers in one article then.

Others who I am suspicious about in this Tuna Fish old bollox fraud include the doctor on the military hospital plane flying the ‘casualties’ home. Indeed he looks suspiciously like Alan Tait – father of alleged Glasgow Bin-Lorry bollox victim Stephanie Tait.


‘Victim’ Carly Lovett is also suspect as fuck. Lovett who was supposedly one of the 38 victims of Selfridge Rizla was coincidentally enough a beauty blogger.

I say “coincidentally enough” because that Zoella bird blogger – who goes from riches to riches – also played Jack Sweeney’s grandaughter, Erin McQuade who was also allegedly killed in the Bin-Lorry Laugh-Along.

And Zoella’s fella was one of those who played that Wolfie fella who allegedly murdered his Mum, Step-dad and little sister – which, as it happens I have an update to write on that hoax too.

Carly Lovett isn’t of course on my list of suspects just because she is – or was – a beauty blogger.

She is in fact on my list because she looks suspiciously like Melanie Earl. Melanie and her fella – who I am 100 % positive is also an actor, but at this moment in time cannot for the life of me remember who else he played – are the Tuna Fish hoaxes token lucky as fuck story, having testified in the MSM to having seen Selfridge Rizla IN HIS FUCKING BOAT, just as they were leaving the beach.


And did you read the old fanny in the above about those two flat-dicks who reckoned that they hid in the hotel for 5 hours?

In other words, despite the early reports of three gunmen we are meant to believe that having shot Selfridge Rizla, the Tuna-Plod concluded that there were no other gunmen hiding in the hotel and definitely no wounded or dead victims scattered about and as such fucked off down the pub?

Worse still, the fraud cunts are not even working to an original screenplay since they had the exact same scenario happening in the Tuna-Fishy-As-Fuck museum shooting hoax  that [didn’t] took place in March of this year.


Hmmm, now who does Christina Rubio-Cube look like?


Now I could carry on and make much of the body count, the position of the bodies and the overall general film feel to the whole thing. Unfortunately time is not on my side as I have much to do.

Nevertheless, there is more than enough information in this article to show that once again, The Cunt Cameron is taking the right fucking piss out of us… Oh how he and his fellow wrong-uns must have laughed when the vast majority of the population did exactly as they were told to do and stood to a minutes silence for the ‘victims’..

Indeed the thought of it makes the cheeks of my arse suck themselves in.

“Not everything is a hoax Spiv” indeed… You daft, stupid, half-witted no-marks, wake the fuck up.

That is obviously aimed at those dumb-fucks who think that “not everything is a hoax”, and not your good selves.

Course, those silly fuckers ought to be glad that I’m not cynical too, else I may even have suggested that the reason the Tunisian government is under so much pressure from our Dishonourable Prime Mincer could have something to do with the recent discovery of a hundred Million barrels of oil under the Tunisian sea bed:

“We are extremely pleased to add this potential large discovery to our portfolio in Tunisia,” said Circle Oil chief executive Professor Chris Green.

Shares in Circle Oil (LON:COP) soared after it announced a significant new oil discovery offshore Tunisia.

The El Mediouni well, or EMD-1, encountered very good light oil shows in both the primary Lower Birsa target and the secondary Upper Ketatna target. Together the reservoir intervals were observed across 133 metres of the well.

Circle said that the stratigraphy encountered in the well was exactly as per the prognosis, and it is estimated, based on information to date, the “most likely recoverable prospective resources” are approximately 100mln barrels.

On AIM, Circle Oil shares were up 28.17% trading at 22.75p each.

Certain tests of the discovery will not be possible, however, because the well suffered technical difficulties. EMD-1 has been suspended.

“We are extremely pleased to add this potential large discovery to our portfolio in Tunisia,” said chief executive Professor Chris Green.

“It is unfortunate that the hole conditions became untenable so quickly and we were unable to conduct a full log evaluation of the hydrocarbon column in the well.

“Nevertheless we intend to take our appraisal effort forward on the Mahdia Permit as quickly as possible following this proof of the El Mediouni petroleum accumulation and will provide further updates of our plans in due course. We look forward to working with ETAP on the next stage of this project.”

Circle added that it has been granted a six month extension to the Mahdia permit  to January 2015, and it has the right to make two further 3-year extensions by committing to drill at least one well in each period.

Investec analyst Brian Gallagher says the result is a significant step forward.

Despite the longer than anticipated drill the well’s result was worth waiting for, according to Gallagher.

“A discovery of this size (Circle estimates 100mbo recoverable) would potentially attract new partners to the basin and de-risks the five existing prospects already mapped on the block,” the analyst said in a note.

Westhouse Securities, similarly, said EMD has the potential to be a “very significant success”.

“But we don’t think the market will give full credit (9p risked, 45p unrisked) until more information is provided on formation integrity and whether it will be possible to produce from the reservoir,” Westhouse analyst Mark Henderson said.

“We think the shares should rally on the news but the market will await further appraisal plans before more fully discounting the discovery.”

Westhouse rates Circle as a ‘buy’ with a 31p target, while Investec’s ‘buy’ recommendation comes with a punchier 70p target. Source

But I’m not, so I won’t… See ya, sign my fucking petition, byyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.