Christopher Spivey

According to a proper brown-nosing Chimp farticle published on the 1st of July 2018, the queen is refusing to have surgery on her bad knees.

The Queen is reportedly refusing to have surgery on her knees because she does not want to miss any engagements during the recovery period.

The 92 year old is experiencing worsening pain and struggles to get up after sitting, reports the Sun.

A source said: ‘She was talking to friends at the Chelsea Flower Show and said her knees were playing up.

‘But she is reluctant to have an op due to the time it would take to recover. She is incredibly brave. Source

What a fucking trooper! Especially when you consider that the cunts have been harping on about Betty’s patella’s since 2011:

As the Queen enjoys a damp summer break in Balmoral, she faces a work schedule in  the months ahead which would daunt a sovereign half her age.

In two months, she is due to fly to Australia for the Commonwealth Heads of Government Meeting, and next year there is a whole series of events planned to mark her Diamond Jubilee.

But at 85, the ravages of time are necessarily taking their toll and causing her both discomfort and an inevitable curtailing of her famously active lifestyle.

She has more or less given up horse-riding on a regular basis, and now, I learn, her other favourite form of exercise — taking her beloved Corgis for walkies — is also being truncated due to Her Majesty’s mobility difficulties.

Her daily walks through the heather in the Highlands are being shortened, I understand. Indeed, Her Majesty’s walking difficulties have been the subject of some discussion by members of the Royal Household. Source

“She has more or less given up horse-riding on a regular basis”… ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha… You really couldn’t make it up.

Yet the Queer reportedly had surgery on her knees in 2003. The following is taken from a Chimp article dated April 13th 2004:

She first had an operation on her right knee more than a year ago after damaging the cartilage when she stumbled on uneven ground at Newmarket racecourse. Then came December’s operation on her left knee. Source

And indeed – according to that article – she was still walking with a stick four months after the operation… When she was apparently told that she would need a complete knee replacement:

The Queen has been told she needs a complete knee replacement, just seven weeks after undergoing surgery that she hoped would cure her problems.

Doctors discovered during a routine check-up at Sandringham that the keyhole surgery to remove torn cartilage from her left knee had not been entirely successful.

Adrian Fairbank, the surgeon who oversaw her last operation as well as the late Queen Mother’s hip replacements, told her that she would need the surgery if she wanted to avoid increased pain.

But he also warned it was major surgery that would involve a much longer recuperation period than her last operation in December.

Then, the Queen had three minor skin lesions removed from her face as well as the cartilage from her knee.

But Her Majesty, who will celebrate her 78th birthday in April, has now evidently decided that even a major operation would be preferable to using a walking stick, taking anti-inflammatory drugs and needing regular injections in her knee joint.

She will now face a two-hour operation-under general anaesthetic, during which an incision of between six and 12 inches will be made down the front of her knee.

The worn or damaged areas of the joint will then be removed and a replacement cemented into place.

The Queen will be expected to stay in hospital for more than a week. During the subsequent recuperation, her activities will be confined to small movements at home, combined with regular physiotherapy. Source: As above

So, fourteen years ago, Sweaty Betty was told that she needed a new knee, yet we are still meant to believe that despite not having one she still goes horse riding at 92 years of age? Fuck off witcha:

PHOTO: The Queer out riding in April 2018 (note the photographer)

“The Queen, eschewing a helmet as she usually does, looked relaxed and in control of her fell pony, clearly with little intention of giving up her favourite sport anytime soon”. The Chimp November 2017… Must be the smallest horse in the world!

PHOTO: The Queer, July 2017

PHOTO: The Queer, June 2017… Does Kelvin Bruce wait around at Sandringham 24/7?

PHOTO: The Queer, April 2017

Her Majesty is also a regular rider and is frequently spotted riding out in Windsor Great Park on her black Fell pony Carltonlima Emma – despite, as she turns 89, reaching an age where most other riders have hung up their hats for good. Source

PHOTO: April 2015… Her horse looks bigger in this photo despite being the same horse as in all the other photos

The Queen’s daily horse rides started at the age of four and much of her private life is still spent indulging in her passion for all things equine. Source: The Chimp August 2014

PHOTO: The Queer 2011… Her horse has shrunk again

And I could go on and on and on, but I am sure you get the picture… Literally.

Am I saying that the photos are photoshopped? Of course I fucking am… Are you really silly enough to believe that a 92 year old crone with dodgy knees goes horse riding? Get real.

I mean don’t you need good knees for horse riding? And how the fuck does she get on and off?

Mind you, if the Chimp was to be believed – which it isn’t – the Queer also goes for a daily walk (source)… Yet she couldn’t be arsed to walk the short distance to the latest troglodyte’s christening and neither could the Duck for that matter:

Prince Louis, the third child of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and fifth in line to the throne, has been christened at a private ceremony in London.

Two members of his family were notably absent. Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip were not present at the christening of their sixth great-grandchild Monday afternoon, according to a guest list released by Kensington Palace earlier in the day.

The UK’s Press Association said the decision is understood not to have been taken for health reasons and was mutually agreed by the Queen and Louis’ parents, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, some time ago/

After retiring from public life last September, Prince Philip, 97, has appeared on only a handful of occasions. In April he underwent planned hip surgery, but attended the wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle just a few weeks later, walking unaided.

Queen Elizabeth, 92, has also begun to scale back her duties because of her advancing age, handing over some of her responsibilities to her heir, Prince Charles.

Late last month, she missed a service at St. Paul’s Cathedral because she was feeling unwell, Buckingham Palace said.

The christening came at the start of a busy week for the monarch, who is due to attend celebrations in London marking the centenary of the Royal Air Force Tuesday and to meet US President Donald Trump in Windsor on Friday.

The christening took place at The Chapel Royal in St. James’s Palace. Kensington Palace tweeted a video of guests arriving at the ceremony. Source

Very fucking strange, made stranger still by the fact that the Duck put himself out to fly to the christening of the daughter of Tom & Alex Hooper’s daughter – where he was the godfather:

Prince Philip has become a godfather again at the age of 97.

On Thursday he flew by helicopter to Romsey Abbey, Hampshire, to attend the christening of the child of Thomas and Alexandra Hooper, daughter of Earl Mountbatten – grandson of Philip’s uncle Lord Louis Mountbatten.

The christening on Friday, at which the Duke of Edinburgh was made a godparent, took place while the Queen was entertaining President Trump at Windsor Castle.

Philip was a godfather to the current Earl, Norton Knatchbull, in 1947. Prince Charleswas best man at the Knatchbulls’ wedding in 1979, the year in which Louis Mountbatten was murdered by the Provisional IRA. 

The current Earl’s 65-year-old wife Penny – formerly known as Lady Romsey and then Lady Brabourne – is a close confidante of Philip and the two have gone carriage-driving together.

Alexandra, 35, was given away by Prince Charles when she and husband Thomas married at the abbey in June 2016.

Philip flew to Romsey from Sandringham, where he has spent most of his time since retiring last year from his Royal duties.

He flew back to Sandringham yesterday, paying for the flights himself, rather than using a taxpayer-funded Royal helicopter. Source

Strangely enough the child’s name isn’t given in the farticle but Penny Romsey is the Duck’s bit on the side and since Louie doesn’t really exist, I don’t suppose the Duck can be arsed to play charades at his age.

Just sayin’.