Carry On Willie


Christopher Spivey


With still a month to go before the 20th anniversary of the ‘death‘ of Diana:Princess of Wills, the media are already in great danger of peaking too soon.

And of course it goes without saying that the Monkey-Nutz over at the paedo-protecting, offensively racist, Daily Chimpanzee are leading the way, having already released over 40 articles in the past two weeks about the “queen of hearts“, who never really was. 

Course, if the ‘official‘ version of events are to be believed – or even if the widely accepted unofficial, official version of events are –  you have to question quite why; twenty years on from Diana being mangled in a Merc, it has become worthy of celebration… Is it an achievement or something?

Indeed it kinda smells of: “Yessss, dead for twenty… Woohoo… You go girl“.

However, having said that I would imagine that there are a significunt number of “right-minded” Turnips who would counter that view by saying that the forthcoming anniversary is a ‘celebration of her life‘ – not a celebration that she is dead… And most definitely not to celebrate Diana’s achievement of knocking up twenty years of being consistently so.

Yet once again, going on the accepted fable, laced with bollox, what did Di of the Dead ever do in her life that is worthy of putting her on a pedestal?

“She was a wonderful mother”?

No she wasn’t. She supposedly threw herself down stairs whilst pregnant with Little Bald Willie. And in doing so, who was in more danger of being killed? Diana or Willie?

Course, suicide or attempted suicide is linked to mental illness and Diana was well documented as being mental – which you would have to be to contemplate killing yourself and your unborn child.

Moreover – and once again according to official his-story – Diana’s stair roly-poly came about following a tantrum, suggesting that she was a spoilt brat, a drama queen and had a severe lack of self control… Not to mention a frightening disregard for her unborn child’s well-being.

Not that there were any unhinged, Social Workers beating on the Saxe-Salt Carlsberg Gofer family’s front door of course – a fact made all the more suspect given Prince Big-Ear’s countless links to paedophilia.

Dead Di also apparently suffered from Bullshit Bulimia.

And of course Bulimia is often linked to other psychological problems such as low self esteem and poor body self-image… Which in turn suggests that Diana was self obsessed which is described in the English dictionary as thus: excessively preoccupied with one’s own life and circumstances; thinking only about oneself.

The last four words will suffice.

Moreover, in what the Monkey-Twatz are hyping as a huge news story, Prince Little Bald Willie of Artificial-Insemination has stunned the nation by revealing that he and Prick Henry of Embryo-Experimentation hadn’t seen Diana in person in the month prior to her ‘death‘:

Course, far be it for me to put a dampener on anyone’s sharp intake of breath, that fact has been a matter of record and in the public domain for 20 years.

Now at this point there will be some straw clutchers who will point out that Diana was forced to be away from Slap-Head & Ginger for long periods due to her royal duties.

And whilst there is fuck all wrong with the delusional desperate clutching at straws, the official facts are that by July 1997 – a month before Di died – she no longer had HRH status and as such had no official junkets to carry out.

Moreover, in that month – which she spent flaunting & knobbing her drug addicted, emotionally damaged, Egyptian boyfriend – her unimaginable wealth & privilege would have easily allowed her to take a few hours off from all that knobbing & flaunting to pop over and see them… But she chose not to.

That isn’t my opinion, that is what the official version of events states without actually saying so. Therefore anyone who would hold Dirty Diana up as an example of a “brilliant mother” has manure obscuring their rose tinted glasses.

Moreover, the fact that the two brothers of dubious origin – Prick Willie & Prick Henry – are actively taking part in this sick pantomime that covertly seeks to change the historical facts based entirely on a lie, is akin to them swimming in the sewers.

Worse still if – as they claim – the Pricks are still haunted by their ‘mothers death‘, and the memories still raw twenty years after the event – despite being brought up in unimaginable luxury – then they are either emotionally crippled or they are liars.

And for those unable to decide which of those two is the correct answer, it certainly is not the former.

However, I did have to chuckle at the Monkey-Kuntz and their new fact-based articles since it would now seem that dead as a Dodi Dodo, Dopey Fayed  was just Diana’s “friend” and driver, Henri Paul wasn’t pissed:

Described by her brother the Earl Spencer as the ‘most hunted person of the modern age’, Diana was killed in a car crash, along with her friend Dodi Al Fayed and their driver Henri Paul, after being pursued through Paris by a pack of paparazzi in 1997.

The article then continues for a few more paragraphs of total bollox, before revealing a few of the doctored photos (fitting the agenda), which Willie was now proudly sharing with us after 20 long years:

PHOTO: Taken from Willie’s privates – a photo of his mother who on this occasion was played by India Jane Birley

The Chimp Crock of Horseshit then continues:

Diana was pursued by paparazzi from the moment her engagement to Prince Charles was revealed until her tragic death. A London inquest in 2008 found the antics of a ‘pack’ of French freelance photographers who chased her Mercedes on motorbikes was a contributory factor in the fatal accident – but the main cause was ‘grossly negligent driving’ by chauffeur Henri Paul. 

A key factor was that neither Diana, her friend Dodi Al Fayed nor Paul were wearing seatbelts. All three were killed, while seatbelted bodyguard Trevor Rees-Jones survived Source

See? Not a word about Dodi doing the Dodo and not so much of a hint about Happy Henri being nine sheets to the wind… Well there wouldn’t be would there what with him now being the French Prime Mincer, Bernard Frenchname.


Mind you, ‘press-hating‘ Willie’s level of integrity shone through as he disclosed to the invited press some of his most treasured memory’s of his dead mother,  whilst whimsically reminding his new found friends from the press how much he hates members of the press who he blames for his dead mum’s demise.

And to be fair, sympathy seeking Willie does seem to have endeared himself to the pressmen that he so despises since the Monkey-Kuntz saw fit to write about him in a sycophantic style that made me want to gag:

In recent years, particularly since marrying and having children, he has been keen to shield his family from media exposure.

Clearly a chip of the old block:

Therefore, with Willie and the Ginger Knob putting themselves about a bit it is a fucking good job that my eBook “The Night Of The Living Dead” has finally been released today on Amazon.

Those of you in the UK click HERE

Those of you in the USA click HERE

Those of you who want to see me dead click HERE

Those of you who don’t want to see me dead, buy the book because I have problems up to my fucking eyeballs at the moment and I’m not even joking.

However, on a brighter note I can tell you that I have now finished writing and am now half way through editing “A Bridge Too Far” – which Gary came and picked up yesterday to begin formatting in readiness for publication.

Unfortunately, at well over 100,000 words there is still a lot to edit, which I am hoping to have done by the end of the week – after which Gary will then also have to format for publication.

Nevertheless, if all goes well it should be released in about two weeks and although I say so myself, it will have been worth the wait… And that now, is the truth.